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Omg.  This past weekend was insane.  For me.

See my hubby’s work had a payroll blip.  They didn’t pay any raises since last year starting this year.  Their program for some reason rejected all the raises from last year.  And when they found the mistake it wasn’t until May of this year. Now, they did correct it, and retroed the newest increases back to February as well as did a catch up pay.  The only issue?  For some reason while M’s paycheck got corrected, it wouldn’t pay him his past pay catch up.  Ugh!

Needless to say, we needed the money, to do a lot of catch up since he had a bad month for no OT.  We were managing to keep up, since we never count on the OT, but I will admit I like my staying ahead of bills much more than stressing on paying them on time.  Silly, but it is how my OCD acts up.  I stress over paying on time.  Go figure.  So we got it this past weekend, and in addition, we had some unexpected large costs that hit us out of the blue.

So grocery shopping was a must, as well as tires for the Traverse.  But we also had some play money when it was all over, and I went to get a picture of an owl from Pier One (and it ended up on sale) as well as buying some jeans.  Since I haven’t bought jeans in years, that was needed.

M got home, and this weekend was spent out and about, getting things that were needed, but passed over for more important things.  Luckily for us, it was alot of sales.  Though M was shocked at how much Arizona Jeans now cost.  But we did everything we needed, shopped, and I found out, M is not to go grocery shopping with me.  He gets agitated, and snaps as we go on, complaining over the items.  He wants an itemized list of what we are going to get, and I put down what we absolutely need, so I don’t forget.  From there, I shop the deals and so on.  Like Mamakitty mentioned to my dad, she spent half of what I got and maybe got a 1/4 of the groceries.  At the same store.  The same time.  But M gets agitated when we spend money, he has this insane idea that because we threw away pork chops one time, that we waste money.  Ugh!

But as many people have, I have weaknesses in shopping.  Mine I know, so I keep away from areas if possible.  One is Old Navy shirts.  No idea why, but I end up with at least 2-3 when I go to buy anything else. Tea, but I do use the teas I buy (Though I need to move around some canisters here soon, I have some tea that is eh in some big ones, while favorites are in smaller ones.).  But my big weakness?

Shoes.

No, I am not Pam like.  I do not have an eye for telling one shoe from another.  I do not need my kitchen cabinets to hold my shoes.  However, I love them. But I am picky.  I always buy what looks good on me.  Shirts are for colors.  Old Navy I think is because their clothing is so soft, and I love their colors.  Same thing for shoes.  What I buy, I use the hell out of, but since I have so many, I keep shoes for years.  And I spend the money on them to have the shoes for so long.

But again, I buy what I like.  I love boots, but only low tops.  I can’t stand anything covering my ankles.  I also do tennis shoes, and am pretty picky on those.  M watches, but he knows that I wear them, and often replace shoes when the tread is gone.  Since I am known to slip as well as my terror at falling is known, it is no big deal.  But I have all types of colors, brown and black for boots, same for tennis shoes, but I have light brown and dark brown in those.  And I have my gym shoes. I have a blue and silver Nike tennis shoes that everyone loves.  I have gotten rid of all the heeled shoes I had for work but for a pair of Black heels and a brown pair that I love and fear them breaking on me.  and I have some ballet shoes.

I have a problem with my ankle and foot of the leg I broke….umm like 7 years ago, that I have to have extra thick soles in my shoes.  And I am bad, I wear only flip flops during the summer.  I call them my happy feet shoes since if you ever look at my tread, I have little happy faces all over the place.  The soles are Yoga mats, and they are so comfy.  I wear them all the time, and often have to replace them every summer, but since they get worn as long as it doesn’t rain or snow even in the winter, they are more than worth it.  They are my house shoes in the fall and spring.

So all this is to tell you, M took me to JCP to get jeans for himself.  And then he made the mistake of taking me to the shoe section. I now have a pair of Blue leather walking shoes.  Sniggers.  But since they were on sale, then I had an extra 15% off, yeah.  A pair of $60 shoes ended up costing me $20.

The happy thing?  I lost a size in shirts. So much yeah.  I guess eating 3 meals a day really does help.  I also stocked up on alot of fruit to snack on.  You know they make a grape that tastes like Cotton Candy?  Yep.  And it’s soooo good.  AS well as I got blackberries, Blueberries, White Peaches, Envy apples and dried apricots.  And we have meals.  Thank god. There is only so much you can do with nothing.

However, this week is packed with me dealing with people.  Today a hair cut, so needed!  Tomorrow is the tires, Wednesday the guy coming to price out a new AC unit and all the stuff to go with it. Thursday is watching my nephews all day.  By Friday I am going to be worn out.  At least that is the thought.

The truth?

I am already bone tired.  See, I am an introvert.  I need days off from the family being around on the weekends.  So to have me out and about, every single day, (Though Connor was thrilled yesterday to be taken to PetCo and Stormy is officially a female as of Friday’s visit with the vet) had me so tired I went to bed at 7:30 last night.  And still exhausted as I am typing this up.  As well as I am stressing out on a project I am doing.  I am to the point of dropping everything to finish it, and am anxious.  It was supposed to be done by the 15th by my timeline I had worked out. Instead I am still working on it.  Oi Vey.

Yes, I have triggers. I hate waiting to the last minute to do things.  Ironically, if it is pass due, I will procrastinate worse.  So it made me to the point I try to do things early.  Like pay bills, finish assignments early.  In fact, my last boss that was awesome learned this and never gave me time limits on things if she could help it.  Cause if I am having one, things are piled up on her as I finish them.  But if there was none, she got things in a way she could handle them.  win win.

It is why M took me out this weekend to get things done, knowing I would worry over them.  I stressed over not having gone grocery shopping on Sunday.  I am so bad.  I know it, and I can’t seem to help it.While I am relaxed on so many things, there are the little things that can get me worked up. And it will build up for a long time, needing me to leave everything behind.  Like Going to Tucson this year.  I am not to edit, and I am not to PLAN anything to be done during the time.  I am just to go with the flow, and relax.  Connor goes with us, since I will fret with him gone.  We will be with M’s family.  And his Aunt and mom are very calming with me.  They make sure I don’t make up a schedule on the split second, telling me there are no time limits and such.

They leave me alone to write or read.  They let me know if they are going to the stores and so on, but not pushy.  At the same time, his mom tells M to chill out. I dont’ stress on bad things, and having things paid ahead of the time is not a bad thing.  And that most of my triggers as she named them, are things that are for a reason.  That most things that would stress out other people are nothing to me.  Mine are manageable for the most part by myself.

It is needed by both of us to be reminded about it.

I know this is a long post, but so many things came to a head this weekend, that I thought, maybe there are others that have the same issues.  That have triggers that stress them out that others may think are odd, or who knows?  It is normal.  It is fine.  You excel in other areas.

Everyone is unique.

My shoe fetish is shared by others.  My worry about paying bills ahead of time is fine.  Especially since the alternative is bad.  My habits are not unique.  On the other hand, I handle emergencies better than others, I can think outside the box easily (to the point my mom is adamant that there was never a box for me to acknowledge).  I can do many things except when they hit a trigger, then I start my worrying.  I am very much my own person.

Ok.. Enough on that.

This week, there will be an update of LOTR.  The bad news?  It is the last chapter I have written.  Yes, I know I need to write, but there are other commitments I am dealing with. (see above!)

I plan (loosely again see above) to write when I am in AZ.  I heard your opinion, and since I wrote AIW in AZ, I plan to write the next one also.   I am also planning to write here as soon as I get through the present assignment. But…Editing what I have comes first, then working on the original novel.  I need to go back and fill out bio’s and so forth to get back in the flow of things.  I hate when I have twins and I can’t remember who did what.  Ugh.

I am trying to clear the backlog so that I can get back to normal.  I know the trip to AZ will set me back some, but hopefully it will allow me to write ahead, so that I am ahead of what you are reading.

There was an interview on Friday on Poca that you can find below:

Poca 1

As well as my story for this week:

A Beacon in the Dark

I have an interview with the author following this.  I also have 196 emails I am trying to get caught up on.  Since… I got the iPad back finally!  Sadly, since Friday when I got the protectors on it, I have had zero time to read.  Ugh!

So I will be around, the chat room will be active when I am online.  Yes, I write and chat at the same time.  If it gets too much, I tell people, and then do what I need to.  Right now, I need to wrap this up so when my hairdresser calls, I can boogie my but over there and get those silver strands covered up along with my bangs cut.  I can’t wait for it to be cooler so I can do more than put it up. This style she has me in is awesome but I still have too much hair to let it cover the back of my neck.  I spend the summer with it up, since also humidity doesn’t allow it to hold the curl either.

So I will see you tomorrow, sometime.  Since I have that tire appointment and it will take awhile.

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