He sighed, it was that time of year again, that time-OW!- were, on a small, yet not insignificant, planet, the dominant species were getting out their reindeer hats and cutting down perfectly good trees to put in their homes for less than a month.
It was always-OW!- an annoying time of year for him, in particular, becau-OH COME ON!-se it always ca-OH!-me with a-FUCKING- great tone of- BLOODY LETTERS!
All the chil-OW!-dren of that damn-SHIT- bloody-OH COM-OW!- piece of rock his father made a million creatures home, were writing their little-FREAKING HELLFIRE- letters to, who they think is this old geezer with white hair and a barrel-belly. Wh-OH WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON-o they are actually sending them too was…
“THIS IS NOT BLOODY FUNNY! Gabriel, was this you, you and father ganging- SHIT- up on me?! HUH?! JUST ‘CAUSE I’M STUCK IN THIS BLOODY CAGE DOESN’T MEAN YOU CAN JUST DO THIS TO ME! I AM LUCIFER! I am the Morning Star, the Deceiver, the DEVIL! I WILL NOT BE- BLOODY HELL! I WILL FUCKING TEAR YOU APART GABE- OUCH!”
Every year. Every. Fucking. OW! Year! For the past, according to Lilith, 7-BLEEDING H-0 YEARS he was subjected to millions of-FUCK!- letters written in barely-readable words- Lucifer inwardly scoffed (then wincing as more letters fell upon him), you could not call those chicken scrawls words- being pelted at him from all corners of his hell-bound cage, their pointed corners poking him all- OW, OH, BLOODY!- over.
Not only that, but these let-WHY?!-ters seemed to be from people actually having the gale to demand toys from the devil?!
And what’s worse about it all-OH BUGGER IT- is that they never even got his name right. OUCH YOU BLOODY FOUL BUG KILLING MONSTROSITY!
As more letters fell upon and subsequently drowned, the second Archangel, far away another Archangel was on the candy-wrapper-covered floor, rolling around in laughter.
“GABRIEL!!!”
Ohhh….poor Lucifer !!
😀💜
Good luck
Jackie69
I love Gabriel!
Gabriel was one of my favorites! In addition to Lucifer, of course. Poor Lucie!
Thank’s ya’ll! I’m so glad you enjoyed it! Twas just a little something that came into my head, hoped people would get a laugh out of the mental images like I do (cracks me up every time).